It doesn’t matter what I do. It doesnt matter if I forgive him for what he has done. It doesn’t matter how much I try to help him or how much I try to fix myself. I will never be enough. You wanted space. You said you still want to be with me. But in all reality it doesnt matter what I do. There’s nothing I can do to make you come back to me. To make this work. Even if I forgive you for what you did on the night I moved out. It’s all pointless. You will never come back to me.
I don’t know why I want you to come back to me. I deserve so much better. I know I made a lot of mistakes too, and I know I caused a lot of the problems too. But I do deserve better.
But why do I want you back. It sucks. I was thinking how a few days ago you said when you felt crappy all you wanted to do was play guitar. That was your outlet. But do you know what my outlet was? It was you. I would cuddle with you. I would cry on your shoulder.
But now you’re gone. And I’m so lost.
I’m okay. I’m going to be okay. I dont know how. But I will be okay.